I am a man on a mission. It’s no secret that we humans don’t like the end of things. To get the end of anything is a real downer. There is one exception; the end of my ice cream rolls. To prove my point, I’m stacking the end of my ice cream rolls against other ends. End to end, you might say. So far it’s The Ends of Uncle Harry’s Ice Cream Rolls: Two. Other ends: Zero.
First; the end of your wits. You do not want to be here. This means you are about to lose it. You’ve tried everything, but nothing has worked. Your calm, cool demeanor is about to disintegrate. Things are about to go nuclear.
Stop. Take a deep breath, and head to the freezer. Open the door. Look inside. There it is — the Uncle Harry’s Chocolate & Vanilla Ice Cream Roll Box. Take it out. Open it up. There’s just one slice left. The end slice. Your fortunes have changed.
The ends of Uncle Harry’s Chocolate & Vanilla Ice Cream Roll are special. Don’t get me wrong. When you eat any slice of this ice cream roll, you are treated to my premium chocolate and vanilla ice cream coated in chocolate cookie crunch.
When you get an end slice, however, you get mucho mucho chocolate cookie crunch. That coating of chocolate cookie crunch doesn’t just go up one side over the top and down the other side. It also covers one whole end. You’re basically guaranteed chocolate cookie crunch in each and every single bite.
I hope you never find yourself at the end of your wits. But if you do, seek out the end of Uncle Harry’s Chocolate & Vanilla Ice Cream Roll. You’ll soon find all is right with your world.